To love is to accept. If you unconditionally love someone, then you unconditionally accept them without needing them to change.
To have intimacy is to be seen. Someone that can hold a safe space for you to be who you authentically are, is providing intimacy for you.
To love someone is to take them on as part of ourselves. Because of that, if we make a decision that will hurt them, then it will hurt us.
Loving yourself is done the same way as loving someone else.
We still live in the emotional dark ages. This means that our upbringing was emotionally neglectful. Because of the experiences that we have had in our lives, we have learnt to deny and reject aspects of ourselves.
We deny and disown aspects of ourselves as a way to maintain and keep a connection with the social circle we are in. This could be our family or friends. At a very young age we learn to do this and it becomes who we are and how we act on a regular basis. Rejecting these aspects are now a subconscious habit that we carry over into our adulthood.
Denying and rejecting these aspects means that we have been denying and rejecting parts of ourselves since our childhood. To practise self love is to do the exact opposite of what we have been doing our entire lives. So it's very normal to find it challenging and weird when you start to practise self love. This is something that everyone experiences on their healing journey.
This doesn't mean that our caregivers don't love or care about us. This is how every generation has been brought up since the 1600's.
The goal is to learn how to accept your aspects. To hear what they have to say to you through your emotions as they are constantly trying to get your attention. We do this by going into the emotions. This is how we heal our emotional wounds.
Self love is something that you learn how to practise.
If you're not accepting all aspects of yourself, then you are not practising self love.
To learn how to heal your emotional wounds and start practising self love, check out my online course.
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